because I certainly don’t have baking to fall back on!!
I can’t bake and yet I keep trying. I’m not sure why except perhaps to convince myself each and every time that it is indeed a fact that I.Can’t.Bake. I want to be sure, like maybe the time before was just because all the planets weren’t aligned properly or something and not at all due to my inability to know which measuring cup is for dry ingredients and which is for wet. Perhaps it is because I don’t want to be that person that just complains about not being able to bake and so I continue to subject myself (and all those poor souls around me that are forced to eat the stuff) to extreme torture. Absolute extreme torture.
My latest endeavor?
I saw this recipe over at Barb’s with all the lovely pictures to go with it. Apple Cake! Paula Dean Apple Cake! I longingly stared at the beautiful finished cake that Barb made. I mean she makes it look so easy, I even told her “I think I can do this”. And so in an effort to impress my family and make Barb proud, I collected my ingredients and lined them up on the counter.
Time = 8:30 pm.
I donned my green apron full of cows in a meadow and off I went. I had the recipe printed out beside me because my computer is in the study and I’m lazy unable to run back and forth.
This was my first mistake. I carefully followed the first step…place the first nine ingredients in a large bowl and mix well. Check! How easy, I love these one bowl kind of cakes! Except my batter is feeling a little thick…did I do something wrong? Gosh I’d better check Barb’s site….so off I go to the study with hands sticky and full of batter and take a look at Barb’s pictures….WHAT??….dry ingredients in one bowl, wet in another….oops. But it’s okay, it still looks good. Now all I need to do is throw in the pecans, cocunut and apples. Sounds easy except for a mini food processor that keeps plugging up with apple bits and a thick batter that is not cohesive with “folding in” anything. Finally everything is mixed and ready to go into my nicely oiled never before used bundt pan and I start dumping pouring in my batter….skreech…..why does only half the batter fit? Off I go to check Barb’s pictures again. Yep looks like it should fit…my pan must be too small….now what do I do?? Think Laura, think. Okay seems I can use a tube pan…I have that…no problem….dig that pan out….and off we go. Cake is in the oven and it’s only 9:15….how about that….I’ll be into bed nice and early at this rate. I check the instructions….set the timer for 1 1/2 hours….WHAT??…..an hour and a half!!! Good God…who bakes a cake for an hour and a half?? Alright no worries, I’ll be in bed by 11:00 no big deal and it gives me time to clean up my mess:
Whew…so now I’m hot and tired and let’s just say a little cranky but I forge on….I mean look at me….I’m baking!! Time for the sauce! Get the sauce made up and ready to pour on my cake except how to you get the cake out if you can’t stop stirring the sauce. I’m yelling at my hubbie…”help, help, I can’t get the cake out and I have to pour my sauce”….he doesn’t come….”HEELLLPPPP, my sauce is burning!”. My hubbie finally comes running and takes the cake out of the oven for me and I’m still yelling at him “it’s only suppose to boil for a minute, it’s been more than that, it’s going to be ruined, it’s going to be ruined, can you please poke the holes, I need HOLES!!” Gosh he is a good man, he got my holes all poked and I poured that sauce all over the cake…ahh would you look at that…..I’m feeling pretty good. Now I can go to bed. Check the instructions….let stand 1 hour…..WHAT??….Good God….who lets a cake stand for 1 hour!! At this point I’m telling myself to calm down Laura, you can do this, you are almost there. So off I go to watch Regis and Kelly and calm myself down and try to stay awake. Finally it is time to turn my cake out onto my plate and call it a day. I was sweating it though because at that moment I realized that I oiled my pan and when I quickly ran back to check Barb’s pictures, you can clearly see she has buttered hers with a disclaimer that says to “get serious when you butter your pan as this cake really wants to stick”…oops how did I miss that part? With bated breath I slowly ever so slowly turn my pan over and….wouldn’t you know it, out my cake falls….ALL.IN.ONE.PIECE. Did you hear me….it came out whole and it looked GOOD!
I did it, I did it and here it is:
Time = 12:05.
Moral of the story = always read the instructions beforehand and know that there is a reason boxed cake mixes exist….and I’m it!
MotoMom says
Hysterical!!! I am going to attempt the cake this weekend. Before I do I will be sure and re-read both your and Barb’s directions. Thanks for the picture of your kitchen, much more in line with what mine will look like when I am done. Barb makes it look so neat and easy – I just don’t know how she does it.
Kim says
Hooray! I get to comment first. I have checked your blog no less than 25 times today eagerly awaiting your entry (I know, pretty pitiful life on this end).
It’s so funny that you decided you could bake this cake. I read her blog with my mouth watering, and thought “I could do this,” but then just as quickly thought, “who are you kidding.” You’ve given me a little hope. Maybe I’ll give it a go this weekend.
I am so proud of you for sticking it out. It looks lovely!
Kim says
Crud! Motomom must have hit enter before me…poo.
🙂
Mommy Dearest says
Woo hoo! I expected a total mess by the end, but was surprised by this lovely cake. I think I’m going to have to try this one, but I’m glad I read your story and know to start it in the morning or the afternoon. ;-D
Lynn says
Great looking cake!!! I thought for sure that today I would be reading about how you had to spend hours cleaning your oven after the foil pouch meals “leaked”. Evidently they didn’t…what is your secret?
Lori4squaremom says
YOu did it! You said you can’t bake, but you really can! The key to this is that you need to read the instructions all the way through before making the recipe! 🙂 You also don’t want to start on a baking project that late in the evening…a sure fire way of guaranteeing that it will bake longer than necessary 🙂
But seriously, Laura, it really does look good! I’m going to have to check that recipe out! It looks great!
org junkie says
Motomom – yes Barb totally inspires me!
Kim – oh it is so nice to have followers LOL
Mommy Dearest – yes you must start this 12 hour cake early in the day…lol
Lynn – my secret to no spill foil packs, use way more than the one sheet of foil the recipe suggests!! I was a busy girl yesterday. Would you believe I baked bread too…in the bread machine but still…
org junkie says
Thanks Lori!
Jenny says
You’re such a good story teller!!!
You had me busting a gut…I just imagined your DH poking holes like a madman in the cake!!
It doesn’t look too bad…that’s usually the way my baking turns out like!!
Have a great day!
Kelli in the Mirror says
Okay, but you haven’t mentioned… how does it TASTE? Because really, I’m of the opinion that if it tastes good, then *you can bake, sistah!* Even if it takes long, that’s the part that gets better with practice. If people are willing to eat what you bake, that’s all that counts.
Lucy says
Laura
I hear ya about the baking. I was going through some recipes online, and ran across this recipe, and I have made it twice already, this week. Here it is http://www.bettycrocker.com/recipes/recipe.aspx?recipeId=4829
The best thing about it, is its easy, and the kids can help and theres not much to clean up, which is even better. I added two tablespoons of milk, cause it was a bit tough. I made it with chocolate cake mix, and also rainbow mix. The kids love it, and EASY EASY EASY.
org junkie says
My hubbie loved the cake!!! I think he was surprised he liked the cake…lol.
Thanks for the recipe link Lucy, I’ll definitely have to try that out.
Laura
Granny says
No, no, Laura, you got the moral of the story all wrong! The moral is that an organized person like you CAN learn to bake and do it beautifully, even if your kitchen DOESN’T look like Barb’s (whose does??)! Good for you, and STAY AWAY FROM THOSE CAKE MIXES 🙂
Susanne says
Hahahaha. Those who laugh the hardest are the ones who can totally relate. Yup. Totally understand you. But I’m not organized either, so I’m really in sad shape! (c;
The cake looks wonderful.
Mamacita Tina says
Congrats on your cake, looks ever so yummy! I get excited about new recipes, and forget to read ahead too. Thanks for the laugh!
Misslionheart says
At least you did it! Well done!
Have a great weekend.
Mrs. U says
The cake looks lovely!! GREAT job!!! I read the recipe, too, but didn’t notice how long it took. I’m sure glad I read your blog before attempting to bake it!!
I just wish I was there to have a piece of it! YUMMM!!
His,
Mrs. U
Katrina says
Loved this entertaining story! My husband always tells me that it doesn’t matter what a baked good looks like – it’s all about the taste. So as long as it tastes good, you CAN bake and you’re a success! 🙂
Barb says
Oh my word, Laura, here I sit at 6 o’clock in the morning with my first cup of coffee, laughing my head off. The minute I saw that you started this at 8 o’clock at night, I thought, uh oh. I swear I was OK until you said your hubby got all your holes poked. I almost fell out of my chair. I know, but we’re all married women here.
Your cake looks wonderful. Girl, you can bake! Isn’t it just the most delicious cake? Rob pretty much ate the one I made all by himself. I’ll probably be whipping another one out this weekend.
Made my day, this post did. I can’t stop laughing but yes, I’m proud of you!
Blessed Beyond Measure says
Laura, being Barb’s sister, I am cracking up over this, as she will too. I loved your “Good God….” over and over. Only my sister would bake a cake, from scratch, that took that long. I’m with you – give the recipe to someone else and invite yourself over for coffee when they make it, and for yourself, buy a box of brownie mix. 30 minutes start to finish and nobody can mess it up.
Angela says
You know, we all have our limitations don’t we? I think accepting them is the greatest thing! Then we can use those boxed mixes with confidence. Mine is brownies. I can’t make them better than the ones in the Ghiradeli box, so why try?
BTW, your cake looks delicious!
John & Lisa says
Hillarious! I think we all can relate to this one somehow!
I have discovered your blog. Love it. Your style of organizing is so personal. The post on organizing your friends recipe box was so freeing for me! You now have a faithful reader of your blog. Thanks for sharing your gift of organization.
MClagett says
I just found your colorful blog through a fellow homeschool blogger. I loved reading your entries.
Hope you don’t mind if I add you to my Google Rss Reader. Would love to keep up with your great ideas.
Mikki from FL
(Yes, right where the tornado’s just hit – but we are ok)
Becky says
OMG…I had to laugh out loud! Sounds like me baking. 🙂 It looks very yummy!
Kim says
It looks wonderful,Laura! This was really funny!!! You are too cute!
Kim
The Wooden Porch says
Great post! I had no idea your kitchen gets trashed like mine! 🙂
Erna says
This post made for a good laugh. I’m SO DELIGHTED your cake tastes wonderful! Maybe you just need to read through the recipe and organize it first . . . then voila! Success every time! I actually organize my ingredients list (breaking up things by lines) to make it easier to make certain things . . . I was actually thinking of you as I was baking or cooking something the other day. Hmmm . . . does Laura organize her recipes???? LOL!
Kimberly says
I too am cuisine challenged. I always blame it on the oven, but as we’ve moved about a dozen times now my husband is beginning to look at me skeptically every time I do.
What a lovely site you have here! Glad to have stumbled upon it!
Posh Mama says
I think that was the funniest thing I have read all morning! And makes me think of my husband who valiantly tries to help me in the kitchen when I make dinner. He always fails to read the directions all the way through, even on the rice a roni box! But seriously, that cake sound DELISH! I may have to take a DAY and make it!
Marcia says
Mmm – that cake looks delicious!
I love baking but only easy stuff – in other words, none of this “mix this and this separately”.
Well done! You have the patience of a saint.
Jennifer says
So funny, Laura! Thanks for sharing.
Jenny in Ca says
you wrote this post so very funny, I am laughing, my sides ache…oh, stop!
the picture of your kitchen is exactly how my kitchen looks when I cook. Explains why I do not like to cook. After all the effort and worry of it not coming out eatable, then to have to clean all those pans, yikes!
I was laughing so hard at the thought of you stiring the sauce on and on, hollering for hubby to come get the cake out!!
I was going to try Barb’s recipe, but now I am having second thoughts. I manage to ruin the boxed brownie mix, everytime. My husband insists on making them. My cookies come out most of the time, but I am known to forget where I was and what I put in already.
thanks for the laugh!
Chappyswife says
Oh, that’s just hilarious! I’m with you. The cake looks delicious enough to try, but dang, what work! I am a master at box mixes. :0)
BooMama says
Oh, that is too funny!
And that Barb inspires us all, doesn’t she?