Purge: to cleanse, purify; to get rid of something undesirable, unwanted, unneeded, impure, or imperfect
Ahhh I’ve said the “P” word. Purging our clutter…….why is it so hard to do? People keep “stuff” for all sorts of reasons:
I might need it one day….
I don’t want to hurt so and so’s feelings….
I don’t want to seem ungrateful….
It was so expensive…..
Do you know how much this is worth…..
It brings back so many memories….
Yes these are all great reasons and you know what…. if you have the space then by all means organize your stuff into designated areas and call it a day. However it isn’t always as easy at that because I have found that “pack rats” will quickly fill any space no matter what the size……the “stuff” eventually overwhelms the space. At this point your stuff “owns” you and not the other way around. You need to take back the control because the one thing you have to remember is IT’S JUST STUFF! The two questions I always ask myself is “Do I use it regularly and do I love it?” If the answer is well no BUT……..place any excuse from the above list here. You know what? If you don’t use it or love it, if it doesn’t make YOU happy, why keep it? Plain and simple. Why surround yourself with “stuff” you don’t use or love? This is what I like to call negative energy. Negative energy manifests itself into chaos, confusion, resentment, unhappiness, discontent, etc, etc, etc. Designate space for the things you love and use and get rid of the rest. It’s okay to give yourself permission to be happy by ONLY surrounding yourself with the things that bring you joy and provide you with function and efficiency on a regular basis.
Okay so back to the excuse list. Let’s address each one:
I might need it one day…yep thats true but if you haven’t used it in a year chances are good you won’t need it anytime soon. You have to weigh the cost between the prime real estate space it takes up and the cost to replace it if by whatever chance you do need to purchase it again.
I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings….okay fair enough….no one ever intends to do that but I would assume the person you don’t want to hurt is close to you or otherwise you wouldn’t be so concerned about their feelings and I can assure you that if they really love you they only want you to be happy. You also don’t have to tell them you are getting rid of it….besides won’t it make you happy knowing you are giving it away to someone else that really will appreciate it.
I don’t want to seem ungrateful……another biggie….it’s all about heart….if your heart is in the right place the giver will hopefully understand…you need to do what’s right for you and your family….again you don’t always have to tell them…..re-gifting is a popular choice for new items as well as donating items to thrift stores….take it to the thrift store in the next town if you are really worried about it….oh and don’t forget ebay….just don’t hang onto something out of a sense of obligation…..it only harbors resentment.
It was so expensive…..yes the ol big ticket item we just had to have and there it sits collecting dust….that happens to all of us and you know you’ll never get back what you paid for it but again you have to remember that item is taking up space in your house that more than likely could be used for something else…..which makes THAT piece of real estate more expensive than the item you are hanging onto! Think about it.
Do you know how much this is worth….it’s not worth anything if its just sitting in a box….if it isn’t something you love or use regularly get rid of it and make some money on it now.
It brings back so many memories….ahh the emotional attachment….this one is probably the biggest culprit that holds people back and so I’ve saved it for last. Our memories are so wrapped up in physical material possessions…..that isn’t where the memory is and you know it. It’s in your heart…the stuff just triggers the memory for you….so many of us are afraid we will forget. I can understand that and I suggest that you take a picture of the item and allow the picture to conjure up the memory for you instead. For example, I have kept the Woody doll my son picked out when he was 2 years old prior to going in for major surgery. Thankfully the surgery revealed that my son didn’t in fact have cancer like the Drs. had originally suspected……and so this small little Woody doll holds all the emotions that surfaced during that difficult but triumphant time. I get it. I also know that if I needed to I could part with it because it’s not what really matters in the grand scheme of things.
Another thing, pay attention to your inner dialogue. For instance, when you are dusting your knick knacks or tripping over your floor clutter and are mumbling and grumbling about it every time you do it…..why do it? It isn’t making you happy…..pay attention to that. Just don’t keep repeating the same negative pattern over and over….do something about it.
When I do an organizing job with a friend and they really want to keep a particular item, I don’t have a problem with that….however it will almost always have to be at the expense of something else….what are you willing to give up to keep that particular item? Pretty soon what you really love and use will become apparent.
I am certainly not saying any of this will be easy. It does take discipline for sure but if you remember to start small, not beat yourself up or get too overwhelmed, you can do it. Let me know about it and I will cheer you on!