When You’re Not Enough…

Today I’m shooting straight from the heart because something has been on my mind.  I follow a lot of blogs and it seems that so many of them are talking about how to organize your Christmas, how to spend less, how to simplify more, how to decorate, how to bake cookies, how to take the perfect picture, how to do this and how to do that.  Now don’t get me wrong these are all really great posts on their own but after reading them one right after the other for weeks on end well let me just put it out there and say this, I’m feeling a little intimidated.  I can’t help it.  It’s a personality flaw I’ve struggled with for years.  The feeling of intimidation usually leads to feelings of inadequacy which usually leads to getting less done and putting myself down.

That horrible good for nothing self doubt sure does rear its ugly head sometimes.  It’s the worst isn’t it?  The feeling that we aren’t good enough when we compare ourselves to others.  I’m pretty sure we all do it at one time or another, in blogland or in life, it’s just so hard not too.  So often those self doubts and expectations we feel weighing us down are all of our own doing though.  We make assumptions of others that may or may not be true and perceptions can be dangerous if we allow them to mess with our minds.

Truth is I’m not near anywhere ready for Christmas.  I’ve had to get realistic about my time and cut some things out because I just can’t do it “all”.   Thankfully I’m really not that stressed about it but let me tell you it’s a constant battle with the good for nothing perception that tells me that everyone else around me is managing just fine keeping all their balls going in the air at the same time, why can’t I?

I recently read a great article that spoke to me of this very same topic.  It was an article written by Dionna Sanchez and published in the most recent edition of Empowered Magazine, a fantastic free online magazine created to equip and empower women to serve and honor God with their lives.  I’ll just give you a snippet of that article here:

As I am contemplating all of this, it occurs to me how prideful we can all be trying to “be enough.”  Because when we try to be enough – it is really for ourselves and not for someone else.  We seem to get it in our heads that we need to achieve some level of “success” in our own hearts and minds to consider ourselves worthy to be loved or to have an attitude of self-importance.  But if I look at it in a different light, instead of from a prideful heart that needs to be validated – I see that God can work more in my life when I’m not enough.  That is when I seek Him and reach out to Him and grow as a believer.  I will never be enough – because only my God is enough.

Wow, that’s huge.  I am so grateful for a God that loves me just as I am, freakness and all, and if I’m good enough for HIM than I’d better just get over myself and let me be good enough for me too.

photo courtesy of moody’s photostream

Filed under: Motivation-Encouragement, My Life

Comments

82 Responses to When You’re Not Enough…

  1. 1
    Avlor says

    So I’m not the only one feeling like this. Sigh of relief. (hugs to Laura)

  2. 3
    MountainLamb says

    Thanks for this post. I was feeling the same way – I decided to make a small change in our house – which has cascaded into tons of extra work. The trailer is just too narrow to accomodate the small change .. :0 so back to square one. And after not even getting cards out for the last 2 years, I’ve really been feeling down. But we are having fun culling through the left over craft items from past years and coming up with creative gifts – and our cards are almost out. Now if I can just convince Joel that the ornaments he’s been putting on the tree need to be wrapped for his gift list! LOL
    Thanks again.

  3. 4
    Mama Kalila says

    Great post. I think I needed to read this right now too…

  4. 5
    Charlene says

    You’ve put into words so wonderfully the thoughts that I think many of us have been entertaining. Thoughts of inadequacy just get worse this time of the year.

    Thank you for being so transparent!

  5. 6
    JackiHollywood Brown says

    It is REALLY hard to feel like you’re doing enough when the Christmas decorations start coming out in OCTOBER!
    Back in the “old days” people didn’t start preparing for Christmas until the Christian season of Advent (4 Sundays before Christmas Day) and even then, often the tree didn’t go up until Christmas Eve.
    If marketers have their way, we will end up celebrating the 12 MONTHS of Christmas, instead of the 12 DAYS – still believing their lies that the more we have the happier we’ll be.

    But that’s just it, isn’t it – the state of “being” isn’t found in the “having” or the “doing”.
    You’re right Laura, He create us as human beings, not human “havings” or human “doings” so, just BE – and BE yourself. You’re just fine and dandy in my opinion.
    Peace

  6. 7
    A Mom Anonymous says

    Here here Laura! I have had to say enough on a few things as well. I feel badly that I have cancelled volunteering in my son’s classroom for the past few weeks and can’t chaperone the field trip (the teacher may have to find someone else to make copies, at least it’s not the kids I’m letting down!). But with so much going on for the holidays and picking up a part time job for the holiday season, I’m just tapped out. So yes, we have to let go of the inadequate feeling. I definitely think that everyone out there feels it right now. Those blogs are a snippet. Those who are writing the ones about how to decorate are probably not baking cookies and vice versa. They can’t possibly be doing it “all” either! And if they are, they are TIRED!

  7. 8
    Organizing Mommy says

    Oh honey! Please don’t feel that way. You would roll over and laugh if you knew all that I gave myself permission not to do! Do you want to hear all that I don’t do?
    First of all, I feel no need to even participate in Christmas unless I feel like it.
    I don’t send out cards; I have a letter that I send out as a response, at my leisure.
    I don’t bake cookies and all that.
    I’m not giving my kids’ teachers gifts.
    I’m not giving my own kids gifts. They can have some cash.
    My few decorations can all fit into a cardboard box.

    I have no guilt over this. If the Lord Jesus were here, would he even recognize this as HIS holiday?

    Just have some fun and enjoy it. I really hope none of my posts made you feel inadequate.. sorry if they did. You are worthy!! You are a great encouragement to all of these gals. You are everyone’s favorite organizing blog, and no one expects you to be perfect. That’s God’s job, remember? Just enjoy what you can.

    Praying for you.
    Blessings, Jena

  8. 9
    Tanna says

    I hear ya! We decorated the weekend after Thanksgiving and by decorate I mean the living room. I haven’t bought Christmas cards yet. I’ll get them on sale this weekend and get them out. I keep it all simple. I see the blogs too and think “oh, I don’t have enough decorations, or I should be doing all these crafts, etc.etc.” I think the meaning sometimes gets lost in all the fluff.

    Don’t worry, keep it simple and keep the real meaning of Christmas at heart and all will be good!

  9. 10
    Annie says

    You know I love you…

  10. 11
    Lisa@take90west.com says

    What a great post. I’ve really been struggling and have spent much time this week chasing here and there when really I just want to be home enjoying my decorations and being still.

  11. 13
    tulip says

    Amen! Thanks!

  12. 14
    kim says

    Hey Sista! Did you forget how much we love “YOU”! If you didn’t bake a single cookie, hang a light, write a card, chop a tree, wrap a gift, or buy a “train”, you’d still be the coolest, sweetest, funniest, kindest, smartest, prettiest girl I know. Hey, you don’t need to fool anyone with trying to “do it all”, cause us smart gals know it’s impossible to do…..
    I say “do your special way” which is pretty much wide open since you’re already so special!! love ya! K.

  13. 15
    kim says

    Oh…….and by the way – you did it again! See. You’ve made so many people feel better by just following your heart to write this post. You are touching alot of people who feel the same way you do…….
    I LOVE your post by the way. Brilliantly written! K.

  14. 16
    Queen B says

    That is such an important post! I’m so glad you put it out there. And girl, you are not alone!

  15. 17
    Susanne says

    I’m so glad you wrote from your heart. Such a timely post. I am so behind this year and totally feeling intimidated and overwhelmed and so needed to hear this.

  16. 18
    The Happy Housewife says

    Great post! I just had my overwhelmed moment yesterday. There is just not enough of me to get everything done!
    Thanks for posting this!
    Toni

  17. 19
    Erin says

    No one has it all together! They just pretend to!

  18. 20
    Gina says

    Oh, thank goodness it’s not just me. I’m so glad to hear you say this. I just stopped posting and wrote about how lousy I’ve been feeling, too much pressure! Thanks for being so honest.

  19. 21
    Luanne says

    Amen–and amen.

  20. 23
    Cindy says

    Great post and one I’m sure more than just me needed to hear. It’s so hard not to hold myself to too high of a standard when it appears everyone else does things with such ease, and does them so well. Thanks.

  21. 24
    se7en says

    Brilliant post! I have a strict rule: only pre-Christmas fun stuff in December… what isn’t done by now I will fudge nearer the time – no gift shopping nothing, my heart can’t take the last minute pace… Interestingly enough – I have only done this the last few years and what used to be a huge stress is really a relaxed holiday feeling. Also – no-one will remember a day or two after Christmas those thing that seem so vital beforehand! Let it go, I say…

  22. 25
    Philippa says

    I really know how you feel. I too am feeling disorganised and am putting a lot of pressure on myself. If I remember rightly, it was the Victorians who first really did Christmas in the way we do. They made cakes and decorated etc., but they really only started the week before. That week was busy but it was only a week. This year I have tried to get my shopping done early and cards written so that I have time to enjoy the run up to Christmas. Once again I have failed in this.
    Great post! Thanks for this timely reminder.

  23. 26
    Rosario says

    Dear Laura, thank you for this great post. I needed this.
    Hugs.
    R.

  24. 27
    Debbie White says

    This makes me feel good knowing that I’m not the only one. I in fact deleted the blog I had started because I felt that it wasn’t up to the blogs of others and that I would mostly post all of the successful things that I would accomplish. It appeared as if I had the perfect life, which is not so. I have many trials that I deal with and God is my refuge. I sort of felt like I was publishing a lie, because it seemed as if I sort of had a fairytale life. It’s so refreshing to know that we are not alone and that others are struggling with this also. Thanks so much for this post!

  25. 28
    Becky says

    This is a wonderful post. Thanks for the timely reminder. I think I will seek out Empowered Magazine.

  26. 29
    jennifer says

    thank for the post. As a mom who works full time out of the home with 3 boys, I have tried to slow down the frenzy of the season. I have learned to say no to the things that make me feel overwhelmed.

  27. 30
    chupieandjsmama says

    Amen Sista! I too have been realizing that I can’t do it all and have cut back this year. I’m exhausted and we still have 15 days to go and I have: no cookies baked, no candy made, no presents wrapped, nothing to wear to the husbands Christmas party (on Saturday – no pressure there), more gifts to buy, and a TON of school things to do. Not to mention normal life stuff and work. I’m so not perfect and I can’t stand that we women are made to feel that we should be (by the media and by other women – hey you from sons school, you know who you are).
    Thanks for the reminder that I don’t have to be everything to all people. I just need to “be” for our Lord.

  28. 31
    Dawn says

    I know that for the people around me it is all about expectation. When we let go to the expecation for our holiday, what we want from others…and just open our heart with love and compassion…then I find that most things fall into place…the rest wasn’t meant to be.

  29. 33
    Kerry J. says

    I found this on another blog – and it really resonated with me – just like your post is doing.

    I Corinthians 13 – A Christmas Version

    If I decorate my house perfectly with plaid bows, strands of twinkling lights
    and shiny balls, but do not show love, I’m just another decorator.
    If I slave away in the kitchen, baking dozens of Christmas cookies, preparing
    gourmet meals and arranging a beautifully adorned table at mealtime, but
    do not show love, I’m just another cook.
    If I work at the soup kitchen, carol in the nursing home and give all that I have
    to charity, but do not show love, it profits me nothing.
    If I trim the spruce with shimmering angels and crocheted snowflakes, attend
    a myriad of holiday parties and sing in the choir’s cantata but do not focus
    on Christ, I have missed the point.
    Love stops the cooking to hug the child.
    Love sets aside the decorating to kiss the husband.
    Love is kind, though harried and tired.
    Love doesn’t envy another’s home that has coordinated Christmas china and table linens.
    Love doesn’t yell at the kids to get out of the way, but is thankful they are there.
    Love doesn’t give only to those who are able to give in return but rejoices in
    giving to those who can’t.
    Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
    Love never fails.

  30. 34
    Barb says

    I’ve seen some of those posts too, Laura, but you know what? Just this morning I’ve read six posts like this one, posted by people who feel like they’re anything but organized this Christmas. I’m a member of that group this year.

    I haven’t seriously cleaned my house in months, I haven’t baked even the first cookie, and I’ve only bought one gift so far. My whole family will be here for Christmas and I’m not remotely ready.

    But I will be. I’m flying by the seat of my pants this year. My goal is to get the important things done and not worry about the things nobody notices anyway, like how clean my house is (or isn’t).

    I’ve just been incredibly busy this year and I’ve decided to do the best I can and not worry if this Christmas isn’t perfect. You should do that too. And don’t be intimidated because the truth is, no one gets it perfect. And everyone is stressed, trying to.

    I plan to just do as much as I can and relax enough that my family enjoys the holiday, even if a few of the things I’ve done in the past just don’t get done this year.

  31. 35
    Kim says

    Amen SISTER!!! You know when I first started blogging I thought I was going to conquer the blogging world. I had no idea what I was doing and actually started trying to be something I wasn’t.I left that thought far behind a long time ago. It’s so much easier to just be me! I’m a nut who has joy to share and a smile to bring. If you want someone who has it all together don’t come to me lol. I almost hate it when someone tells me that I have it all together because it just makes me want to go out of my way to prove them wrong lol. All I’d have to do is video one day of my life and broadcast it and it would either become a comedic sitcom or I’d be admitted lol.
    I loved that you spoke from your heart today!
    Hugs to you!
    Kim

  32. 36
    Becki says

    It really is hard to get out of the habit of striving for perfection. Thanks for putting it all into perspective for me. I appreciated your thoughts, especially at this time of year.

  33. 37
    Vicki says

    WOW!!! I’ve been following your blog for a while now and haven’t commented – mostly because I’m usually reading in such a hurry!!!! But today your post reached out and grabbed me and pulled me in. I can’t believe the timing of this post!!!
    Just last NIGHT, I laid in bed and sobbed to my husband about how inadequate I feel. I feel like I’m a bad mom because I am not making memories with my kids like others do. My best friend does EVERYTHING with her kids (decorating, baking, Xmas traditions, gingerbread houses, etc) and I don’t find the time for any of it. I feel like it’s going to be a terrible Christmas b/c I have no gifts bought and nothing decorated.
    My plate is so overflowing right now – I work FT outside of the home and my job has expanded and I can’t get it all done. My mother is having mental health issues and I’m the only child here to take care of her. And I never seem to have enough time. On the weekends, I guilt myself terribly b/c it’s the only time I have to get things done, but it’s also the only time I have to really spend with my kids.
    I TOTALLY have the “Superwoman” complex and fall short ALL THE TIME!!! It’s very hard to deal with. Although it makes me feel good that I am not alone. Maybe I can take a deep breath and remember what’s important. I just wish I could get rid of the feeling of failure. And like the article said “it’s for myself and noone else.” My husband doesn’t put any pressures on me to keep the house immaculate and yet, I feel it’s my job but it’s never clean enough.
    I want to try to be “enough” and it’s so hard.
    Anyway, I’ll stop rambling now. Perhaps this was my therapy today to deal with my sadness. Thank you for being so willing to share your heart and feelings. It really touched me today!!!
    God bless you…

  34. 38
    Joy says

    Thank you for posting it right when I needed it. :) Check out Sanctus Real singing “Whatever You’re Doing” on YouTube.

  35. 39
    Heather says

    Great post, Laura. I think our society today puts a lot of emphasis on being-it-all and doing-it-all and unfortunately I think moms are the target of all this perfectionism. And yes, I am one of those women who sometimes looks at others and thinks that I am not doing things well/big/perfect/special enough. Then I step back and itemize all that I am — not what I am not — and what I have — not what I have not — and tell myself that what I am can be wonderful as long as I can embrace the positive and let go of the negative — and remember that I am only human!

  36. 40
    Nicole says

    Well said. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

  37. 41
    Melissa says

    God is so amazing. Not only did He lead you to the article that eased your heart, He put it in your heart to share your personal struggles with the rest of us. After reading your post, I thought, “Wow! It’s not just me!” I was scrolling down the comments to add that thought, and I saw that very thought echoed over and over and over. Thank you for helping all of us realize that no one has it all together! You are such a blessing!

  38. 42
    Holly says

    Bravo! I think we stop trying to do it all and become a little more realistic with age.

  39. 43
    Holly says

    I try to remember that a lot of the people who decorate so much and do all the crafts have kids that go to school while I home school or their kids are all grown. I struggle wanting to do things – I think it is just my natural desire to be crafty that I have had to put on hold for this season of my life- more than trying to keep up with anyone else. I do have to remind myself it is a season. When I try to do to much I am yelling at everyone or not getting laundry or dinner done.

  40. 44
    Heather says

    Thanks for this post. I always feel like I don’t measure up around this time of year. I haven’t even finished putting up the decor, but I decided last night…I’m not! I am packing it all away and what is done will have to be good enough for this year. I always love coming to your blog. I have not posted pics, but I have organized right along with you. Thanks for your encouragment. ((hugs))

  41. 45
    Valerie says

    Most people can do one or two things really well; but very few people can do everything really well.

    Choose what is most important to you and your family, and what you are best at and do a few things, don’t try to do everything.

  42. 46
    jsprik says

    don’t feel bad, i haven’t sent out a letter OR cards, yet. don’t know i f I even will this year (im so bad), and i never have anything organized as much as i would like too!!! just do your best and bag the rest, i walways say!! ;) be careful nt to judge yourself too harshly! it’s bad for your mental health!! take care!!

  43. 47
    Wonderwoman says

    The Lord made us all different, each with their own gift. What would the world be like if we all had the same gifts or skills? We need to appreciate each other for our strengths and help each others weaknesses. Your strengths – I don’t have them, but I admire them and enjoy reading about them! As the Veggie Tales say “God made you special and He loves you very much”! Merry Christmas my blogger friend – you are special.

  44. 49
    Tonya says

    Funny, I thought for a minute I was reading my own thoughts. Thank you for your openness. I’ve found over the years that it is in my transparency that I have been the greatest blessing to those around me. If we all would stop pretending to be something we are not, we would not feel so isolated.

  45. 50
    Erika says

    Thank you for this post. It’s clearly ringing true for so many this year… as I keep looking at the calendar and realizing how little time there is between now and Christmas… my world is not going to come to a crashing halt if I don’t get all the cookies made, or the gifts wrapped in the fancy wrapping with ribbons and bows. All that stuff is so trivial compared to what the season is truly about.

  46. 51
    Roberta Anne says

    I am a new visitor to your site and I just finished my daily blog tours and saw all the incredibley creative and beautiful things that a lot of very clever women are doing. I hope that I can “borrow” a few of those ideas maybe for next year. But today your post touched my heart and helped me remember that I do what I can and I love exactly what the Lord has blessed me with and my heart is content.
    Thank you.
    Roberta Anne

  47. 52
    Chris says

    Thank you for this. Amen to everything you said!

  48. 53
    Brenda@CoffeeTeaBooks&Me says

    I wrote recently on my blog how I overcame “Christmas frustration”. I had it quite often.

    I now write out a list of seasonal activities that “make my heart sing” and those which are important to my family.

    We then make those a priority. This year we have very little money to spend but we’re enjoying our decorations (simple but cute), reading with the tree lit nearby, splitting a pumpkin spice latte’ between the two of us, etc.

    I’ve made this list for many years and it has set boundaries around me which TV, magazines, and other blogs cannot harm.

  49. 54
    Virtually Organized says

    This year my personal mantra for the holidays is what am I NOT going to bust my butt trying to get done. I put out only about 1/4 of my decorations this year (just my favorites) and I’m so excited that after the holidays clean-up will be in a snap.

    For me it’s about what priorities I hold near and dear to my heart this holiday season. Baking with my girls is more than a to-do, it’s making memories. Trying to make the “perfect” table centerpiece to impress my guests is just more stress than I need. I’ll settle for simplicity instead. And anyone who wants to judge me because of it can take their judgement and. . . well, you get the point! ;)

    As women, and especially as mom’s and domestic divas, we tend to put way too much pressure on ourselves, even when we know we shouldn’t. You’ve obviously spoken to A LOT of women with this post. Thanks for reminding us all to live up to our OWN standards, not those others impose on us, either intentionally or not.

    Debbie

  50. 55
    Shanna says

    {{Hugs}} {{Hugs}} and more {{Hugs}}!!

    Thank you for your post and thank you for your blog. Your timing could not be more perfect (for a lot of us) and that, I hope, gives you strength to have a better day tomorrow and comfort to know you are not alone.

  51. 58
    queenbeetracy says

    Hey Laura. I’m a lurker who loves your blog but stays quiet. However, this post inspired to stop by and say “amen sista!” I can’t even find where the balls are, much less try to keep them in the air (smile). Just know that you are not alone in how you’re feeling. I just finished reading “The Purpose of Christmas” and that was a nice wake up call for me.

    Thanks for sharing yourself with the world. Have a Wonderfully Merry Christmas!

  52. 59
    Katherine says

    Thanks for shooting from the heart. My feeling is that I’m missing out somehow if I don’t do it all. Like, what kind of Christmas would it be if I don’t sing The Twelve Days of Christmas to my daughter at least once? It’s really not possible to do it all but I realize I still try–that’s just setting myself up for disappointment. Thanks for the reality check and encouragement.

  53. 60
    Rachel says

    That’s certainly true, and wonderfully said.

  54. 61
    Shawn says

    FINALLY. An HONEST mention of insanity. I feel right at home here with you. ^_*
    In most recent weeks I’ve confessed to my husband that I’m going to stop subscribing to all of these “winner mommy bloggers” because it’s just a daily reminder of how talentless, and out of control I really am. Most times I feel discouraged reading blogs rather than encouraged. Through no fault of anyone but myself – clearly.

    You have just become my most favorite blogger. Thank you for your post today. I’m stressing over wrapping gifts, buying gifts, making snacks for the neighbors, mailing out cards , and somehow I can’t even get my Christmas tree decorated. Heck, I can’t even stay on top of laundry, much less anything extra like holiday stuff!!!

    I forget where I was going with all this (my mind is so scattered), but I just want to say thank you. Thank you for making me feel better about my shortcomings.
    May you have a blessed Christmas!!!

  55. 62
    Pam says

    I’m so glad to read your post. I had to give myself permission to not do any more than I feel like doing this year.

    As a single person with nobody coming by for the holidays, I decided that I would only do stuff for me. Presents were purchased early and mostly online or from consultants. I have 2 wreaths, 2 poinsettias (still alive), a table arrangement and mom’s ceramic tree in my window. That’s enough and I’m happy.

    Life gave me a lot of stress due to a medical problem being diagnosed with lots of running around for testing. Christmas hoopla is less important than the prayers I’ve started praying more often. I will probably send 3 cards to 3 college friends who’ve I’ve reconnected with online and have been a regular source of support for me. That’s enough and I’m not really missing it.

  56. 63
    Anne says

    Wow! It’s great to know that there are so many others who fall into this category. This year is feeling utterly different due to many family health issues. I just haven’t been able to get excited about Christmas yet. And I’m feeling like a loser for not getting anything ready.

    Years ago I discovered the book Simply Your Life by Elaine St. James. Since reading that I quit doing Christmas cards and never looked back. I’ve not regretted that for a moment. I keep in touch with those near and dear to my heart – the rest is unnecessary pressure. And my kids’ teachers are also sans gifts!

    I think the main issue for me is all the hype about it (perfect decorating/cooking/gifts) that keeps our focus away from the true meaning of Christmas and in many cases keeps our attention focused on “doing” rather than on the people around us. I’m guessing the key is figuring out what things bring value and meaning to your Christmas (love our family BINGO!) and what things are just hype.

    Thanks for this great post!

  57. 64
    Carolyn says

    Well my organizing friend, I have had to wipe up the tears from my keyboard before I could leave my comment. You are such an inspiration on so many fronts to moms, bloggers and some of us organizers out here. And you have a wonderful readership.

    I admit to having one of those “25 Things to do Before Christmas” blogs. Hopefully, it will provide some people with the tools to enjoy their holidays without the stress and pressure that we put on ourselves.

    When I work with clients, I help them create an image of the life they desire for themselves and their families. That image is based on their values and priorities. If we all stick to those values, whatever they may be, then no well-meaning blog can ever take away the joy of living our lives with our own talents and gifts.

    My own values include my love and support for my family first and foremost. My son is being bullied at school. The cards will wait – maybe to next year, but he and I baked together the most beautiful lop-sided gingerbread men you could ever want. The house may not get decorated but I have booked an appointment at the school to escalate the intervention on his behalf.
    God Bless

  58. 65
    Marci says

    Wow, I thought I was the only one struggling with this! Everyone else seems to have it all together but I guess it isn’t so! Thanks for posting this, Laura. I needed this!!

  59. 66
    Kirstin says

    I’m not anywhere near ready either. I haven’t shopped, don’t know whose hosting what and my decorating isn’t what I would like. Yet I’m pretty okay with it all…except for the shopping part. I don’t enjoy it when moneys tight and I can’t buy for all those I want to buy for or for my kids as I’d like to. So you’re not the only one for sure….I haven’t even baked anything and probably will only do two or three things.

  60. 67
    Plain Ol' Food says

    Jena said “I have no guilt over this. If the Lord Jesus were here, would he even recognize this as HIS holiday?”

    Jena, I don’t think He would. It’s pretty certain that He wasn’t born in December and making a big deal out of birthdays is a relatively recent thing so chances are He didn’t celebrate it then and doesn’t now.

    Feeling like all of you describe is what led me to seriously re-consider the whole Christmas thing about 14 years ago, which in turn led me to simply not taking part. After all these years, its just another day. We have no tree, no lights, we don’t do any special cooking or eating, we don’t get or give gifts or cards, etc. I *will* go to Dallas this year to see some family members but that’s simply because they’ll be there instead of Iowa. :)

    Giving up the holiday altogether might not be for everyone but I can’t tell y’all how wonderful the lack of stress, pressure and work are. Last year, DH and I went out for Chinese food and watched TV. It was absolutely great!

  61. 68
    Faye Lewis says

    Thanks for the eye-opener. I thought it was just me. LOL. I have been disabled for 17 years with a chronic illness. The first 14 years, I did it all! And I paid dearly with flare ups and a long recovery time.

    The past 2 years and this year, I have way lowered my expectations of me.

    I am sure Jesus would recognize the celebration of his birthday at our house.

    All gifts are given with love and charity. If I can, cards go out. On Christmas Eve, I bake a small cake with a few candles and we quietly celebrate the “Reason for the Season”.

    Thanks again for helping me justify my actions.

  62. 69
    Hopefulmom says

    This year I said, “No Christmas cards.” I did say “yes” to cooking a meal for a family whose daddy is battling cancer and a dear friend who is having ankle surgery today. I feel a whole lot better about spending time cooking for these families than I do about sitting down to address and stamp 80-100 cards. I also feel better about spending the $42 on food for these families than postage.
    Just trying to keep it real and actually DO the stuff God says to do.

  63. 70
    Vickie says

    Wow Laura this is excellent! I have pulled way back this year. I did not even decorate our mantel! I want this CHRISTmas to be more about what took place all those years ago than the chaos or struggling to keep up with what everyone is doing. I want TIME to spend with my growing family since I only have a few more years and they will all fly the nest!

    You hit the nail on the head with how I have been feeling. I am so glad to see that I am not the only one that feels this way!
    Blessings to you and yours!
    Vickie

  64. 71
    Creative Triplet Mom says

    This year due to lack of funds I have only purchased gifts for the kids and for my nieces and nephews. I have called family members and told them ONLY KIDS

  65. 72
    Creative Triplet Mom says

    Oops I posted before I was finished. I did not participate in any cookie exchanges after last year I said never again. I did send out my cards later than normal with such sadness in my heart I am just not in the holiday spirit. Luckily I no longer decorate and only need to take out the Menorah next week. We did go to the MOMS Club holiday party but for once I did not take one photo. Really weird for me since my camera is always an extension of me. We will see Santa on Thurs at the library. The kids for the first time made letters to Santa which they will give to him on Thurs.

  66. 73
    Stephanie says

    Oh Laura, you are not alone at all! Despite my desire to be organized and have things simplified to be free to focus on what is most meaningful this Christmas, unexpected circumstances have come up leaving me with a long to-do list, unmet expectations, and a feeling that I just really don’t have it all together. Even the things that would truly help us focus on Christ in this season have been a bit much for me to manage at times, and I have been dropping balls right, left and center.

    And in a way, I am glad. Glad to realize once again that Christmas is not about me and my ability to achieve and pull it all off, or to perfect the ideal “simple” Christmas, or even to do all the right things to focus on Christ and on loving others. I can’t do any of it on my own, and it’s really not about me and what I can do anyways.

    It’s all about Him this season. Humbling himself, to come to us, who are so desperately in need of Him. This year, I am choosing to be oh-so-grateful that my God would condescend himself to save such a weak, needy, imperfect people, and reconcile them to Himself. And that gives me so much joy this season!

  67. 74
    Teresa says

    I love your blog. I’m actually feeling like me, the most unorganized person in the world can do it, actually I’ve already gotten a decent start, thank-you.

    • 74.1
      Laura says

      Thank you so much Teresa! So proud of you!!

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